Rhythms

I've come to realise that there's a mechanical component to creating success or visualising and achieving goals. And by mechanical, I mean artificial and forced.

For some time I've been wondering: What would it be like to simply 'let go' and see where life takes me? To trust that I'll end up where I'm most needed, without my having to 'push' (visualise) the future? To find that life, despite my fears, is inherently friendly, safe and supporting?

I vaguely sense there's a deep rhythm underlying what I intend to do (even though I'm not in the least certain of what that entails). Sometimes I lose connection with it, at which times I 'stress out' .. wondering what on Earth I'm doing here. But inevitably it seems I'm drawn back to 'letting go'.

Perhaps I should explain in more detail.

Years ago while in sales of computer systems to corporate clients, I started having the same unsettling dream. This dream frequently re-occurred for a number of years. I would find myself in a lift (elevator) and it would start free-falling, me along with it ... I literally felt the sensation of falling. The sensation was quite real, so much so I would hold on 'for dear life', fearing I would hit the bottom and die. This 'holding on' would cause me to remained pinned to the ceiling as it violently and dramatically accelerated downwards.

Odd then, that on occasion there would be others standing idly in the lift as it accelerated downwards, all the while with me stuck to the ceiling. Sometimes they would look up at me, without any particular expression. Eventually it somehow occurred to me, perhaps because of sheer frustration that it was safe to let go and fall, and when I did ... amazing experiences followed. Without going into detail here, they were, in varying ways, all the same - I was 'safely caught' or gently guided to safety and into vivid, wonderful experiences.

I eventually left sales to being my own business, but the dreams persisted (sometimes with me again resisting, other times letting go).

Some years later I left the business world to begin writing (Be and Become), and I've not had the dream since. That sense of 'falling into life' has stayed with me, and has led me to seek a more fluid, intuitive path, one that isn't quite so pre-planned or 'visualised.

It has required me to 'let go' many of the expectations of others, and of myself.

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